That whole "love thy neighbor" thing.....

I believe the date was Saturday, January 26 at approximately 4:40AM. Actually, I know it was 4:40AM because I remember looking at my phone wondering why the hell anyone would be blasting music and having a party with drunk-sing-a-longs that STARTED at 4:40AM. James and I were dead asleep when the thumping bass started. You can read the blog about the first two incidents and how I handled them here: http://www.desireeheadley.blogspot.com/2013_01_01_archive.html

On Friday, February 8 at 3:59AM, a fourth incident begins (I never mentioned incident #3 as it was only loud music on a Sunday night until about 11PM - still not acceptable, but not the anger-enducing incidents of before or #4). The thumping bass, the loud people, the drunk sing-a-longs - AT THREE FIFTY NINE IN THE MORNING and I have to get up for work in 2 hours. I once again put my clothes on, venture down to apartment 9, bang on the door - incessantly, loudly, persistently until someone comes to the door (I kid you not, my fist was sore later that day). The guy is the definition of an asshole. Opens the door looking all bothered and pompous that he had to get off his fat ass to open the door. He cannot coherently speak so I get right to the point - "please can you turn the music down?" I am not nasty about this. I am taking the "you get more bees with honey rather than sugar" or whatever that statement is.He mumbles something else that I don't understand and I walk back up to the apartment. The noise does not stop, in fact, it gets louder.

By 4:45, James is out of bed because now he is awake. His alarm - which was set for 5:30 because he had a very early flight to Belfast - no longer necessary. I lie in bed hoping it will stop and I can get back to sleep. By 5, I am up and I hear James talking to someone. He's called the non-emergency police line who told him to call the Cheshire council and also the Environmental Protection Agency (interesting). He has emails for them all so sends emails. I get a load of laundry in the washer. We are fuming mad. I go out on the balcony and look over the edge. Sure enough, there are 2 guys sitting outside smoking. I ask if they own the place, they say they do not and they don't even know the guy that lives there. They were invited back to drink and party and they did. I asked who invited them back and they replied it was the guy that lives there - Giles. Sweet, now I have a name. I expressed my displeasure at being awakened at 4AM, they apologized profusely, they asked if I wanted to come down for a drink (oh yes, sure, let me just get dressed and I'll be right down), they asked if they could cook me breakfast, and the invited me to breakfast with Giles at the Alderley Bar and Grill at 10AM. Hmmm, this gives me an idea. Crash breakfast? Make a scene? No. Maybe just wake Giles up early in the afternoon.

The music stops at 6:20AM. James takes off for the airport and I drag myself to the gym. I fully intend on leaving work early to discuss this niose situation with Giles. And I do. I text James and tell him I am going to talk to the guy downstairs and if I don't arrive at the airport to pick him up, I have probably been murdered.  I have a plan in my head. Knock on the door, DO NOT, under any circumstances, accept an invitation INTO the apartment. Politely decline and tell him that you just want to speak with him very quickly. Be every kind and explain to him that both my husband and I work and need to be up early in the morning and that we cannot live with the noise issues at 4AM. And of course, everything goes to plan.

Prior to going down, I peak over the balcony to see if there is any movement in the apartment below ours. The door to the apartment 9 balcony is open. Okay, he is home. I begin my journey down the 15 steps to the 2nd floor, heart pounding, blood rushing to my face, adrenaline pumping. I knock on the door - 5 consecutive, polite wraps. No answer. I know he is there and I'm not giving up on this. 5 more polite wraps - a slight bit harder this time - and I wait enough time for someone to get up and walk to the door. No answer. I decide I will try one more time. 5 wraps - for the third and final time - MUCH harder. I hear movement. Okay, this is happening. How should I stand. Arms across my chest seems pissy. Hands in my pockets? Hands folded in front of me? I want to be non-confrontational. I go with hands in back pockets. I don't know why. It felt comfortable. I hear the deadbolt unlock and the chain is being pulled through. Here goes, the door opens and what I see shocks me into a stutter.

A short, blonde lady approximately 60 or so years old answers the door and looks at me as if to say "yes, what do you want?" I finally gather myself (no WAY this lady is partying at 4AM) and ask if Giles is home. She says yes and asks who I am to which I reply "I'm a neighbor." She invites me in. Oh crap, this was not part of the plan! I agree and tell her I will just wait in the foyer. She calls back to Giles who tells her to send the neighbor back. Okay, surely he won't murder me with this woman here, right? I go back and Giles is stting down unwrapping cigars out of plastic wrapping and putting them into a cigar box. He doesn't get up and barely looks up as I begin my dissertation. Giles has short, dark hair swept over to the side and appears a bit tired. Our exhange goes something like this:

Desiree: Hi Giles, my name is Desiree and my husband and I recently moved into the building. At least 3 times now we have been woken up at approximately 4 in the morning by excessive noise  coming from this apartment.

At this point, Giles gets out of his chair - I guess getting ancy that I'm calling him out? As he gets up, I notice a limp, a metal brace on one of his legs, and his arm is somewhat limp.

Giles: Oh, we had an outrageous party last night.
D: Yes, I know. I heard it all night.
G: Oh, well, that's just a once in a blue moon type of thing.
D: No, actually it's not. This is the third time this has happened and we've only been here for 5 weeks.
G: No, that is not true. I haven't even been home that much. Last night was the first party I've had in ages.

Not wanting to argue, I get to the point.
D: Okay, well, I hope it is not a problem ever again in the future, but if it is, how would you like me to let you know that your party is keeping us awake? Twice I have come down and knocked on the door and someone who was obviously not you answered. When I asked for the music to be turned down, it wasn't. So what would you like me to do if the noise gets too loud again?
G: Where is your bedroom?

I must point out what an incredibly STUPID quesiton this is. Our apartment is directly above ours. All of the apartments in the building are fairly standard and EXACTLY the same if they are in the same part of th ebuilding (i.e., one on top of the other). I look at him - displaying just how stupid I thought his question was.

G: is your bedroom above where we are standing right now? We were in his kitchen.
D: no, Giles. our apartment is the same as yours. It is directly above yours.
G: Well, if your bedroom is back there, you aren't hearing my music. I NEVER play music in the bedroom.

At this point, this man's stupidity is beginning to irritate me - and it begins to show. Keep in mind, I had very little sleep.

D: Giles, do you not think that sound can travel through walls and doors? Do you not think that if you play music in your kitchen, the sound will travel to your bedroom if it is loud enough?

Lady: my name is Elaine and I am Giles' mother. Giles has a disability and I come up quite often to help him around the apartment. Maybe one evening you and Giles can do a sound test to see what volume is too loud because sometimes it's not about the volume, it's just the bass.
D: yes, sure (all smiles) that might be a good idea.

What I really wanted to say was: Well, thank you dear Elaine. What a great idea, except that i don't care what volume is too loud or what bass level to thumping because THERE SHOULD NOT BE ANY MUSIC PLAYING EVER AT FOUR IN THE MORNING!

Elaine: You see, Giles doesn't work so a party on Thursday night is not a big deal to him.
G: THAT'S NOT TRUE! I work.
E: Well, he doesn't work on Fridays .
G: Yes, I work for the government and don't have to work on Fridays. I am not here a lot and that is why I know that the noise you heard three times wasn't me. It was me last night, but it must have been the people next door.

WHAT??????? What government shuts down on Fridays? I would like a job with that government. (it was brought to my attention by a friend later that perhaps what he meant by "I work for the government" is that he was accepting unemployment checks from the government. Clever. I don't know what his story is and I have no desire or intent to really find out).

D: Well, my husband and I both work on Fridays and need to be up early every morning. Playing loud music between the hours of 4 AM and 6 AM is not acceptable. So, what would you like me to do when your music and the people in your apartment are so loud at that hour? As I mentioned, this is the third time this has happened.
G: No, I did not have any other parties.
D: Okay, please just let me know what you would like me to do to let you know that your party is too loud. Obviously knocking on your door is not helping.

At this point, I believe Giles is getting a bit nervous because his mom is there. As he glances between the two of us, he says "hold on."

Giles goes into another room, Elaine and I exchange insincere smiles, and Giles and emerges with a silver case and hands me a business card. NOW we are getting somewhere.

G: here, take this. If it gets too loud, my phone number is on there and you can call that.
D: Great, thank you. I hope to never have to call you, but I appreciate you giving me this.
G: Well, if you call because it's noisy and I'm not here, I'll have you call the cops!

Apparently this was an attempt at humor. I showed a fake smile.
D: Thank you very much for this card. I honestly hope I'll never have to call you.
G: sure.

As I begin to make my way towards the door, Elaine says "aren't you going to walk her out?"

WHAT?!?!?! NO! I don't want him to walk me out.  it's literally about 20 steps to the door. I don't need help, thank you.

As we walk toward the door, Giles behind me, he says (again) I'm not here that often and I don't keep a car here so if you ever need an extra parking space, let me know.

WHAT? You and I are not friends, Giles. I am being polite to you, but I would really like to punch you in your face for keeping me and James awake all night.

So that's the end. I went upstairs, I realized I watch too many episodes of Criminal Minds. I could just imagine Elaine and Giles sitting in their apartment plotting how to kill me. The old "mom-obsessed-with-disabled-son-so-doesn't-mind-giving-him-everything-he-wants-including-feeding-his-killing-desires" storyline??? I laughed at myself (and hope it's not the case......just stop watching scary psychological thrillers).

We have had no episodes since, but this whole "love thy neighbor" thing is not an easy task.